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So I'm behind on content as I have a 6 week old daughter that rules over me now. The podcast has been great to put on at 3AM when she won't sleep, or 6AM when she won't sleep or heck why not 1AM when she won't sleep. But either way I'm watching it behind schedule and in chunks. With that in mind, I'm like 2/3 of the way through the St. Patrick's Day After Dark craic (that's Irish for fun and is pronounced Crack).
Anywho, there was a bunch of stuff I was hearing that wasn't really getting answered. I'm from the UK, but have Irish parents. I also work in the video games industry so I've moved a lot. I've actually lived in Scotland (Dundee) previously and spent 5 years living in Galway on the west coast of Ireland. I thought I'd take a bit of time to answer some of the questions that were asked and not properly answered during the ep, about these 3 places.
1 - Do Irish wear Kilts? Yes they do! However it's not 100% certain when/where it all started happening. Some say it was the 1900s and military related. Some say it's as far back as 1590. However they treat the tartan differently - having the colours related to the regions in Ireland, rather than the families/clans like they do in Scotland. Saying that there are some families with registered tartans. 2 - What's up with St. Patrick and the snakes? This response could be a long one. So I'll keep it short. Ireland, Northern Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England all have their own "patron saints". It's questionable whether any of them ever actually existed. St. Patrick however, is the most likely to have existed. He was a Christian Missionary that came to Ireland to spread the "good" word. At the time, Ireland was almost entirely Pagan/Druidic. St. Patrick was banished by the druids for attempting to convert people. He was banished to a small island cluster where he built his first monastery and began housing people that were homeless/shunned by local towns and villages. Eventually, the work he began ended Druidic religion in Ireland and the "snakes" in the story are an analogue for pagans. There's actually a few kinds of snakes that can be found in Ireland. One of my dogs was actually bitten by an Adder when I lived there! 3 - What's the link between Ireland and Scotland? Another long answer that I'll try to keep short. Actually this could be a very long answer. But Scotland as we know it today was essentially formed by two ethnic groups - the Gaels and the Picts. The picts inhabited what is now Scotland for the most part before the Gaels arrived. The Gaels had been coming over from Ireland as far back as 500AD. Gaels (Gaelic speakers - the Irish/Scottish language) were a society based on Clans. Some of those clans - one of whom was called The Scots - were aggressive. Due to their aggressive nature, they were avoided by other clans and eventually decided in the middle ages that they wanted to create their own society. So, they began taking land on the west coast of what is now Scotland. At the time, the Picts inhabited a lot of that area of the country, with some Germanic tribes on the east coast and some Norman (kinda English) settlements towards the south of what is now Scotland. The Gaels came over and slaughtered a lot of the Picts and their society, taking the land and settling new villages. They eventually took most of the country, combining some Picts and Normans into their society, but essentially driving most cultures out. So, essentially, the Irish and the Scottish are ancestors and share a common language. No one really talks about Pict culture any more, but they were quite fascinating. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Picts. This is obviously an incredible simplification of hundreds/thousands of years of culture and societal change. But yeah, there's more to it than just hating the English. 4 - Who actually likes the English? No one. Not even the English like the English. I'm from the Midlands, who are hated by northerners and southerners, simply for being from another part of the country. Self loathing and sarcasm is at the core of a lot of English comedy. We "take the piss" out of ourselves and each other as a form of flattery. Heck, as a people, we keep voting the Tories in - that says as much as it needs to about self hating. 5 - Russell Brand and how to alienate yourself from the average human. Oh man. Where do we begin. I've never really liked him. He used to be one of the biggest names in British comedy. How far he's fallen. He was "cancelled" in 2008 after calling a guest live on radio (the Andrew Sachs, who played Manuel in Fawlty Towers) and leaving a series of terrible voicemails about Sach's granddaughter, who Brand briefly dated. It ended his career on the BBC and other channels wouldn't touch him. He then tried his hand at alternative shows and channels, but the damage was done. He was outcast. He was also a massive drug addict and spent a long time in rehab - coming out almost enlightened. He created a YouTube channel and started something called "The Trews" which was a play on The News crossed with Truth. All of this content was very much left leaning, but through the lens of "everyone should live a free and happy life". There was actually a (I thought brilliant at the time) show where he hosted Jordan Peterson and the conversation was really engaging. This was pre-Peterson meltdown mode before he went completely down the Nazi rabbit hole. Anyway, that kind of just died out as he went away from talking about Buddhism, freedom, meditation, essential oils, yoga and fairness - and more into the COVID style conspiracies. I think a lot of "lost" left wing types saw familiar arguments with things like vaccines. It's an easy jump to go from "I think we should all be allowed to do our own thing" to "you can't force a vaccine on me, you fascist". Given the proximity of that sort of content to right wing media and Brands rapidly declining popularity, it doesn't surprise me this is where he's ended up. He IS right wing now, but like others, he's been lead here without realising, but now he's dug his heels in because he's 100% ego and no common sense.
If Brand does come on the podcast, be ready for a rollercoaster of madness where he might even have a psychotic episode. Honestly. He's a mess now and neck-deep in the world of conspiracies.

Hey :)
I have a quite a pile of library books to get through before their due date and was wondering if anyone would like to do a buddy read for any of them?
The list is as follows:
The Mist - Stephen King Malorie - Josh Malerman Lara the Runaway Cat - Dion Leonard Alfie the Doorstep Cat - Rachel Wells Without A Trace - Carissa Ann Lynch All the Bright Places - Jennifer Niven The Whispering House - Elizabeth Brooks The Lost Girls - Kate Hamer Insomnia - Sarah Pinborough A boy and his dog at the end of the world - Charlie Fletcher The unravelling - Polly Crosby Shell - Paula Rawsthorne Bring Me the Horizon : heavy sounds from the steel city - Ben Welch The interview - C. M. Ewan The Langoliers - Stephen King The murals - William Bayer Whistle in the dark - Emma Healey Professor Green : lucky - Stephen Manderson

A little context, We've (33M 31F) been together only 5 months, she found out at 2 months she was pregnant (inwhich I'm over the moon, not an ideal scenario but hey ho) she's at 13 weeks right now.
She moved in with me when we found out , she is very unhelpful when it comes to chores, expects me to cook,clean all.the time, expects food and a bath ready for her which I don't get the favour returned . I like to be productive on my days off but she'll happily stay in bed all day drinking tea and eating snacks.
She complains about everything, and always critisizes anything i do (not using the right cloth to disenfect, not using the right detergeant to clean windows. Has a go at me when I leave sneakers in the bathroom, tells me off for leaving coins in places) really petty stuff.. I feel like telling her It's my house ill do as I please!! When I hint at her to help with the chores she gets all defensive and causes a row with me about it.
She started a fight with me the other day and said it was over and that I'll never see the baby when its born, I won't be allowed at the baby scan appointment ect, she used it as a weapon and it hurt me,
I actually dread going home from work most says, I feel like I can never do any good for her Am I a asshole for thinking of breaking up with her ?

My boyfriend (M26) and I (F27) have been together for almost a year. I'm American and he is German, we met when we were both studying in London. He recently got a job in Germany, and our plan has always been for us to get an apartment in Germany once he'd found a job, as I work remotely and can work anywhere in the world. It was always my plan to settle in Europe, however Germany is more of a culture shock than England. It is my second time here, the first time I visited it was for three months. I had my own airbnb and things were pretty great. I have been here for less than 2 weeks now, and I'm feeling a lot less comfortable. We are staying at his parents house, and although they are super nice and welcoming. When he is at work all day, I don't feel 100% comfortable. On top of that, when he gets home he is usually very tired and cranky. I know he is still adjusting to work life, but I don't think he is empathetic towards the large adjustment I am currently facing.
Last night really made me re-consider whether a move here is right for me. I waited for him to come home so that we could have dinner together (it was 9:30pm) and he fought with me because what I wanted to cook would take too long and he only wanted a snack. He snapped at me, that I should have just had dinner earlier with his family. We ended up not speaking the rest of the night, and this is the second time this week that something like this has happened.
I don't know if it is super drastic to call it quits and leave, or try long distance. And I don't know if it will get better once we have our own apartment. I also don't want to sign a lease if he will continue to be like this.

I've been searchging all day without finding even an image about it.
It was about a group of people that was put on a fake spaceship undergorund as an experiment, it started fine until during the night one of the men heard noises and found a weird naked humanoid figure eating their food in the kitchen, then it ran out of the spaceship.
He realized it was opened from outside and so they all went out, when they got out of the spaceship the earth was very different, it looked like another planet for them and so they put their spacesuit on, they also found a house in the middle of nowhere that lead them to a small city in this weird planet/earth where they found other people in a bar, but it was weird and some of the main characters started disappearing.
The movie leaves you with many questions like "were they on earth or another planet?" "if it was earth what happened?"
If someone could help me out with the name it would be amazing.

I’ve been looking for something outdoors that my kids and I can do together while exploring the woods behind our house. Slingshots seemed like a fun idea so after learning the safety aspects of it, I’d like to get us all one. My budget is probably around $40 for me and $20 each for the kids (7&6 years old) if it’s realistic. We live in Germany but I didn’t see anything about them being illegal with a quick google search. I’d prefer online links if possible. They don’t have to be EU specific as we have an APO address also. Thanks!!

According to our (Global Info Research) latest study, the global Hydrogen Bicycle market size was valued at USD million in 2022 and is forecast to a readjusted size of USD million by 2029 with a CAGR of % during review period. The influence of COVID-19 and the Russia-Ukraine War were considered while estimating market sizes.
This report is a detailed and comprehensive analysis for global Hydrogen Bicycle market. Both quantitative and qualitative analyses are presented by company, by region & country, by Type and by Application. As the market is constantly changing, this report explores the competition, supply and demand trends, as well as key factors that contribute to its changing demands across many markets. Company profiles and product examples of selected competitors, along with market share estimates of some of the selected leaders for the year 2023, are provided.
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Key Features: Global Hydrogen Bicycle market size and forecasts, in consumption value ($ Million), 2018-2029 Global Hydrogen Bicycle market size and forecasts by region and country, in consumption value ($ Million), 2018-2029 Global Hydrogen Bicycle market size and forecasts, by Type and by Application, in consumption value ($ Million), 2018-2029 Global Hydrogen Bicycle market shares of main players, in revenue ($ Million), 2018-2023 The Primary Objectives in This Report Are: To determine the size of the total market opportunity of global and key countries To assess the growth potential for Hydrogen Bicycle To forecast future growth in each product and end-use market
Market segmentation Hydrogen Bicycle market is split by Type and by Application. For the period 2018-2029, the growth among segments provide accurate calculations and forecasts for consumption value by Type and by Application. This analysis can help you expand your business by targeting qualified niche markets.
Market segment by Type Fuel Cell Electric Bicycle Hydrogen-powered Bicycle
Market segment by Application Personal Transportation Competitive Sports
Market segment by players, this report covers
Pragma Industries H2 Bike Intelligent Energy Ruggeri Linde AG Cycleurope KOGA Bicycles Trek Bicycle Corporation CERES Power Velorapida Trillion Cycle H2X E-Bikemotion Technologies Orbea Mando Corporation A2B Bikes Energica Picycle Youon Technology Co Ltd
Report Chapters
Chapter 1, to describe Hydrogen Bicycle product scope, market overview, market estimation caveats and base year. Chapter 2, to profile the top manufacturers of Hydrogen Bicycle, with price, sales, revenue and global market share of Hydrogen Bicycle from 2018 to 2023. Chapter 3, the Hydrogen Bicycle competitive situation, sales quantity, revenue and global market share of top manufacturers are analyzed emphatically by landscape contrast. Chapter 4, the Hydrogen Bicycle breakdown data are shown at the regional level, to show the sales quantity, consumption value and growth by regions, from 2018 to 2029. Chapter 5 and 6, to segment the sales by Type and application, with sales market share and growth rate by type, application, from 2018 to 2029. Chapter 7, 8, 9, 10 and 11, to break the sales data at the country level, with sales quantity, consumption value and market share for key countries in the world, from 2017 to 2022.and Hydrogen Bicycle market forecast, by regions, type and application, with sales and revenue, from 2024 to 2029. Chapter 12, market dynamics, drivers, restraints, trends, Porters Five Forces analysis, and Influence of COVID-19 and Russia-Ukraine War. Chapter 13, the key raw materials and key suppliers, and industry chain of Hydrogen Bicycle. Chapter 14 and 15, to describe Hydrogen Bicycle sales channel, distributors, customers, research findings and conclusion.
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The Global Information Research Department can customize the report according to your needs. The report can be personalized to meet your requirements. Please contact our sales team, they will ensure that you can get a report that suits your needs.
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You must use a software stack that you can rely on to deliver successful results when web development. Modern web developers use a variety of new technologies to complete projects more quickly and effectively. A fantastic illustration of this innovation is the MEAN stack. During the web development process, web developers can use publicly accessible repositories and libraries using mean stack. A mean stack application requires extensive forethought and planning. Yet a robust backend created with the right tools can optimize development time and help you streamline your resources.

What Is a MEAN Stack Development?

Millions of people all over the world use the JavaScript-based app and web development platform known as MEAN Stack. Web applications are created by combining a variety of technologies. The open-source technology stack known as MEAN is made up of a number of different tools and frameworks, including MongoDB, Express.js, Angular, and Node.js. To create outstanding mobile and web applications, each technology works in harmony with the others. From the client to the database to the server, MEAN JavaScript is executed.
With MEAN Stack software, you can manage your items based on specific attributes. Without having to worry about migrations, the data layer can also be completely updated. Language is one of the main benefits of the MEAN stack. Each tier of the application uses JavaScript, a single language. This significantly contributes to improving the effectiveness and modernity of the approach to app and web development.
You can decide what factors to take into account when hiring a web development company whether to go with in-house development or outsourcing, by first understanding the advantages of MEAN stack development and what you need from the project.

Different MEAN Technology Stacks

1. MongoDB

Because it uses a NoSQL database management system, the documents can have various fields, contents, and sizes, which makes them simpler to manage. MongoDB is a very adaptable document-oriented database and schema base that communicates with applications' backends using the JSON query language. It is a well-performing database with built-in sharding because it does not need to store related data in tables and does not require a primary key or entity keys for access.

2. Angular

A top web development framework that is magic and offers a fluid, interactive user interface (UI) appropriate for enterprise-level web applications. In addition to supporting two-way data binding, binding syntax resolution, and a number of directives, Angular evaluates and modifies the DOM. Create HTML single-page client applications using TypeScript's structural framework.

3. Express.js

Hire MEAN stack developers to write the codes quickly and securely, adhering to industry standards for your web development with features and plugins. With an HTTP module for Node.js, Express.js provides a web framework with fast page loading.

4. Node.js

It uses an asynchronous language and is open-source and cross-platform. A top-notch JavaScript runtime with an efficient event-driven design. Your web application will load more quickly and you will have access to the important benefits of mean stack thanks to a solid backend.
Also Read Mean Stack Vs Mern Stack

Why Should Your Next Project Use MEAN Stack Development?

1. Development with Lower Costs

The JavaScript programming language, which is open-source, is used to create MEAN Stack technology. An open-source full-stack JavaScript framework called MEAN JS can aid you in maintaining your freedom and open-source status. As a result, the platform is also open-source, meaning you can use it and download it for free. Businesses that develop MEAN Stack do not also charge license fees. Additionally, the MEAN stack requires fewer overall developers than the LAMP stack.

2. Adaptable and Effective

MEAN Stack greatly simplifies and improves the effectiveness of developing, testing and deploying apps. The web developer can quickly start cloud platform testing once the app is created. It has a competitive advantage and is more effective than the majority of other systems. One of the most popular languages used in project development is JavaScript, which makes it easy for the whole team to switch between tasks and deal with problems.

3. Utilizing Javascript

Data management and recovery make extensive use of JavaScript, a multi-paradigm, high-level language. The entire MEAN web development process is implemented using the JavaScript programming language. Overall, it's a very developer-friendly framework that benefits the entire MEAN Stack development team by enabling faster backend responses and application growth.

4. Simple Data Transmission

When creating new products, it is simple to comprehend, use, and understand. Data transportation throughout the system is also comparatively painless with the aid of mean stack development services. Anyone can quickly learn MEAN stack development, regardless of whether they are front-end or back-end developers. Node.js and Angular both use JSON files as a data exchange format.

5. Participatory

Angular is renowned for its incredible user interface (UI) and user experience in any web application (UX). Real-time apps let you interact with a wide range of users. As a result, Angular.JS, which is regarded as the best front-end technology, is used by many of your favourite companies.
It also supports Model-View-Controller architecture, which ensures the excellence of user interfaces.

6. Influential Group of People

Developers enable the frameworks. Numerous people use JavaScript.The most well-known instance in their network is the replacement of Angular.js with Angular.

7. Eternal Modules

The MEAN stack can manage an infinite number of modules thanks to Node.js. Web developers don't need to write lengthy programs in order to achieve specific results because these libraries offer pre-defined outputs. Additionally, it offers a sizable selection of JavaScript modules that the users may find useful. Libraries simplify the programming process and hasten web development. Overall, These libraries ensure that the entire code is correct and are incredibly quick.

8. A Wide Range of Talent

There are experts everywhere who are committed to assisting other medium-stack web developers with their issues. Additionally, one of the most popular programming languages in use today, JavaScript helps web developers all over the world and aids in the evaluation of web development companies.

9. Superb Performance

A crucial part of the entire MEAN stack for development framework, NodeJS ensures high performance. NodeJS offers better results than other programming languages and is simpler to grasp and comprehend. It is possible to develop interactive web-based applications with high-end outputs. You can hire web developers to help you create web applications using NodeJS, which is the most popular framework for building high-performance server-side tools and solutions.

10. Management Efficiency

The management team is not perplexed because the dynamic teams all speak the same language. A web development company that uses MEAN stack projects benefits from the use of JS.

Conclusion:

The MEAN Stack framework is the best option available for creating dynamic, exceptional, and highly rated-online apps. To produce cutting-edge web and mobile applications, the majority of top web development companies heavily rely on MEAN stack technologies.
​
Originally published on Hyperlink InfoSystem

Not sure if this is the right forum for this, but if not perhaps someone can suggest a more appropriate one.
We once rented out our house to a guy and his family who owned their own business. I was relocating for work and the house had not sold, so it was our only way to balance the cost of the relocation. It was done through an agency and all seemed above board. However, it turned out that he was a friend of the agent and his background issues were not revealed to us before we agreed with the rental (I'll come back to this later). Initially it was all fine but after some months the tenant stopped paying the rent and despite reassurances from the agent that they were sorting this out, and the tenants that it was 'just about to get sorted...cash flow problems with the business etc' we eventually moved to evict.
After eviction what we discovered was horrific. The house was wrecked - including walls damaged, fittings torn out, furniture gone or trashed, the flooring pulled up and dog excrement everywhere (we weren't told they had a dog). There was £10K of damage. My wife and I were heartbroken. They had even torn up a tree we planted when our daughter was born, and we had told them specifically when they moved in that wherever we went in future it would be going with us.
To cut a long story short, the police weren't interested, they said it was a leasing matter. The Agent denied everything and lied about the contacts made with the Tenant (never visited once clearly as the damage was such that it must have happened over a period of time and somehow they missed it) the Ombudsman found in our favour and awarded us £500. A drop in the ocean.
I took him (on advice from CAB) to the Small Claims Court and got two £5K awards. That was in 2016. I have had not one penny since. Turned out he was a Bankrupt when he rented from us and since then has a load of creditors for business dealings and personal stuff after him. He ignores everything and endlessly reshuffles his business to keep himself from liability.
Determined (for my own sanity - my wife would prefer to let it lie) to keep going to make him pay in some way, I employed a Private Investigator to do a report on his whereabouts and potential assets and we got a current address and it turns out he has a business in his name. I then turned this over to a Sheriff Officer to serve the two orders on him. He ignored them. Next step was to move to have his wages arrested...but of course he is the owner of the business so ignored the request. The Sheriff Officers said that they had no further jurisdiction so I would have to go to court to pursue his business and arrest its funds.
I went to a Solicitors local to me (we live in a small town with limited choice), but unfortunately they allocated me a trainee (this is no slight on the young lady as she was very nice and I'm sure really competent) and the best she could come up with was writing to him to ask him nicely (with accruals of interest the amount he now owes is £10K) and if nothing happens we could consider Sequestration. She was not optimistic about the prospects, given his slipperyness, but her firm wanted £750 up front for their costs. By the looks of their charges I would have burned through that in no time for little prospect of success. I have now stalled the process to rethink.
I am loathe to let this go. It's not the money now. Actually, to get a result against this c**t of a man I would happily lose a very large chunk of the money, but it looks like I would lose more money and get nothing, and more importantly he gets away with this again - at my expense. It's galling. If I damaged my neighbours garden, or car I would get arrested almost immediately and face a fine I'd have to pay or face jail time. He faces no consequences from anyone. And is still openly posting his business services online, and Facebook page with his business etc.
So, my ask is - does anyone have any ideas how I can get somewhere with this? Any advice appreciated

We've been married 8 years, have no kids but had two 2 miscarriages in the past 6 years, which took a toll on our marriage.
The 1st miscarriage in 2017 was at 17 weeks, a baby girl we wanted to name Joy. We were both devastated but she believes she grieved more than I did, although I was always the one who had hoped for children while she never wanted any up until then.
The 2nd miscarriage in 2020 was around 12 weeks. It was the first several months of the pandemic. We work in a hospital and the intensity of my duties kept me away for days at a time. Even when we met, I tried to keep a distance to keep her safe from possibly catching the virus, which she understood at that time because the Covid situation then was very severe worldwide and there was still a lot we didn't know about it.
But after miscarriage, she resented me bitterly. She then decided we'd be better off without kids. I didn't want to cause her any more grief, so I went along. Since then, it's been up and down, mostly downs. Eventually I started to spend even more time at work to avoid her wrath at home. We still see each other at the workplace (she's another department) but at least it's civil.
Last year, through a series of misunderstandings, she started to accuse me of having an affair with our colleague. This colleague was my college ex, we moved on 20 years ago, which my wife knew about too. I swore my innocence repeatedly but she refused to accept it. We argued for months. In the process, I said some nasty words, said it wouldn't be surprising if I left her for that woman since my wife was such a terror. I deeply regret it now. I don't think she herself truly believes, but she took my words as admission of the non-existent affair and demanded a divorce.
We started proceedings and separated last April. She still lives in our house while I've practically moved into my office. But on occasions when I returned home to collect stuff or when we attended events outside, we'd enjoy our time together - like the dates we used to have before everything went awry. We managed to have some very good sex too, so I started to find more excuses to "pick up my stuff" couple times a week and she never turned me down.
I'd say our relationship improved drastically after I agreed to the separation. I didn't have the time or interest to date anyone else and to my knowledge neither did she.
​
Now, about 2 months ago, she suddenly turned all cold and angry again for no discernible reason. She called in sick for a few days and ignored all my calls, messages and shrugged me off when I checked on her.
2 weeks later, my brother finally learnt the truth from another colleague - my wife is pregnant, with twins.
I'm very hurt at the way I had to find out, but that's beside the point. The colleague later told me she explored her options for abortion but did not or has yet to go through with it because my wife reportedly told her she "knew it would break (me) for real" if she did.
Hearing that, I was reaaally hopeful that this pregnancy would save our marriage. I have been so miserable.
But when I approached my wife about her pregnancy, I discovered that she was (and still is) in a terrible rage at me. She keeps telling me not to get my hopes up, keeps flinging the abortion threat in my face, says she'd rather raise the children on her own because I'll never have time for them, insists she still wants to go through with the divorce, will take care of herself, won't need maintenance, and basically many illogical, contradictory and hurtful things.
She has even been trying to convince me that the babies aren't mine. But in one tired distracted comment while mad at me, she said they've driven her crazy "just like their father". Another day, she declared she hates me and hates my babies. Yet another day, she blamed me for picking a good date to intentionally knock her up - we spent the whole stretch of Christmas Eve to New Year's Day together, had unprotected sex throughout often at her initiation, and now her EDD is the date of our 1st miscarriage. Unless she managed to slip out in secret to bang the deliverymen, I really don't see how the babies aren't mine.
She also said she's gonna quit her job and move out for good so we never have to meet again. And she is really packing up her stuff at home into big boxes and has been researching renting dubious walk-ups in lousy neighborhoods far from me.
Meantime I'm relieved at least she's still seeing the OB and taking her iron, folic, screening tests and avoiding alcohol, caffeine etc. While mostly cold and snappy, she still lets me take her out for meals several times a week and never rejects food or massages from me. The other day I even spotted two twin pregnancy books on her car seat when I peeked in. I was incredibly heartened.
​
I have no doubt she's terrified and conflicted. But she's so stubborn and angry that I just can't get through to her. She's made clear counselling and therapy are out of the question, and I can't slip her any tranquilizers either since she's pregnant.
I'm worried sick about her for so many reasons:
She's pushing 40 and that already puts her at significantly higher risk for many pregnancy complications, carrying twins to boot. So far no major issues detected, the usual anemia, low BP, some spotting; cervix unremarkable. But her face gets a gaunt green cast from nausea or headaches most mornings even now, and though she's showing quite a bit, she has actually lost considerable weight. She was already borderline underweight. Can tell she gets dizzy or breathless easily but she still insists on climbing up and down needlessly packing her boxes and even wants to lug them down the stairs herself. Of course I put an end to that nonsense when I see it, but I'm really terrified she'll hurt herself trying to prove some reckless physical feat when I'm not around. Or pass out in the bath alone at home.
She goes on about me never having time for a family but bars me from her OB visits - which occurs at our workplace! I've had to install "spies" all around her to find out how she feels, yet even that is difficult - the guys are useless as she knows their loyalties to me and I can't be too pally with her women friends in case she develops another misunderstanding, which would be the worst time for that to happen again. So far only my brother and his gay partner have been my greatest help as she genuinely adores them. She forbids us from telling both sides of our parents about the pregnancy and keeps trying to suck in her belly to keep it a secret as if people are blind. She was never like this before.
I'd like her to take a long break from work or even quit entirely so she can get sufficient rest and hopefully regain her sanity, but I know she'll be insulted or suspicious of my motives and it will also be much harder for me to keep an eye on her if she's not constantly pottering around near us. She might also use that newfound free time to really run away forever.
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I really really really want to be around for her and our babes, but I'm so scared of destabilizing her with anything I do or say.
I've turned this over in my head time and again but I truly truly don't believe that we have reached the end of our marriage. I feel like there's still so much evidence pointing to the fact that she still loves me.
Many people claim it's clear I'm a calming presence for her (the irony!). My bro says even now her eyes always sweep the room until she spots me. She still publicly defends me in arguments in my absence and is always empathetic when I have a trying day (as long as it's not caused by her). I don't know what I would do without her.
She seems to have it all together in public but it's a different story in private. These 2 months, in the rare few instances I've dared raise my voice back at her or when her rage has driven me to break down, she would become immediately contrite, retract her words, apologize profusely, and then inevitably become distressed to tears, at which point I would have to spend more time consoling her. Those are also the only times she allows me to guide her in techniques to calm her erratic breathing. But sometimes I think I'm having a panic attack myself.
It's all terribly exhausting for us both but even more so, it is simply gut wrenching for me watching her. The 2 miscarriages left me wracked with guilt; there are many things I wish I did, I truly don't want her to have to go through that trauma a 3rd time. I'm a medical professional and there's so much I know in theory but I am really at my wit's end when it comes to my delicate pregnant wife who's perpetually in an uncontrollable rage at me. Everything I've done is wrong. I'm so fucking scared. I'm so fearful I will again unwittingly hurt her irreparably. And there are still so many weeks more to go. I don't know if we can make it.
When I ask what she wants from me or what I can do to make things better, she says impossible things like carry the babes myself, leave her for good, or to father other children with other women. My god.
I have thought long and hard about it and have put this to her as gently as I could: I don't need to have kids. She doesn't need to have kids. If it comes down to that, I would save our marriage over saving the babies. Or if saving our marriage is impossible too, it would be OK as long as she is happy and healthy again. Mentioning this invariably leads her to more rage and more inconsolable tears. She is incensed that I'm "choosing between them" or trying to force her to choose, which I'm not! I'm just trying desperately to say there's no pressure, there's nothing I could ever want so badly that I can't do without, I swear it. I'm just so afraid she can never be herself again. Should I help her arrange for an abortion and make her go so that the choice is mine?
​
I've tried so hard to analyze and identify/eliminate any potential causes for her rage.
I never comment on her growing belly or boobs in case she flares up. She definitely likes belly rubs, back rubs, calf and head massages so she certainly doesn't hate my touch. She doesn't gag when we kiss. It's not about the sex either; in fact it seems to put her in a better mood for a very short while. We're not financially strained (unless she really intends to divorce me and refuse a cent while trying to raise the twins on her own) and both of us can arrange for prolonged time off work if we really need to. We have a part-time cleaner so any chores she ever does herself is because she wants to. Anything she can't tolerate, I've stopped eating as well. I've given her copious supplies of vitamins, essential oils and home remedies for her nausea and headaches. I've been spending so much more time with her now, work is really just an afterthought. I've tried ignoring her provocations but she would follow me and demand a response then accuse me of patronizing her. To protect her sense of independence, I even let her continue to drive despite my concerns about her terrible driving.
There are some things I can't compromise though - no way I'd let her have sashimi or lift the heavy luggage and boxes herself. Admittedly I'm a bit of a nag about drinking enough water, taking her supplements and BP monitoring. But can I really allow her to be so reckless and go her own way?
I suspect my presence alone might be a trigger for her rage. But apparently not having me around distresses her too. 3 times these 2 months, I was shocked to learn that when I missed minor meetings or events without first informing her (though I had no idea I was expected at all), she disappeared into the bathroom to cry. She insists it was nothing but once let slip that she thought I stayed away because I was angry at her, which is so irrational. Why would I be angry at her??? My bro and his partner concluded that my absence was the only consistent factor for her odd behavior.
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I'm ashamed to be such a bumbling clueless husband. Truth is she's surrounded most of the day by people and family perfectly equipped to handle any physical problem that might occur. Yet I've never felt this stressed, helpless, blindsided and impotent my entire life. I am at a total loss. And it's been only two months since I found out. Last night she screamed at me to just stop bothering about her. So today she drove herself to work while I stayed home to despair over the keyboard wondering if it's tears or rage now because I actually heeded her advice. Maybe I should have feigned ignorance about the pregnancy from the start.
It was very hard for me to put this all down in words, I'm sorry it's so long and incoherent, but I've really reached my wit's end. I don't usually log into Reddit, so this is a measure of my desperation. If anyone out there studying this convoluted essay can help figure out any hints to the root of my problem or if anyone can offer a desperate man some sound advice - that works - on daily methods to handle my fiery pregnant wife or tips on how to dissipate her flying rages... please help me. I will be eternally grateful.

Okay so to start this off, my wife works 12 hour night shifts so if the timing seems off, this is why.
We got our new puppy last month and over the last few weeks I've began to notice a pattern whenever my wife is home vs at work. Our puppy will bark and whine constantly in the crate when my wife is home but whenever she's at work, she is completely silent in her crate. I know part if it may be due to the fact that the puppy definitely has separation anxiety BADLY and barely listens to me since I'm the stricter of the two of us.
But the part that confuses me is I know for a fact the dog has separation anxiety with my wife because the dog goes into a full on panic if my wife leaves the room or even goes on the other side of the doggy gate thing we have in our livingroom. Like full on panting, pacing, whining, barking, etc. Full panic. But whenever my wife leaves for work, or leaves the house in general, the dog never panics. It's like she fully understands that she's not in the house and will be quiet in the crate or even when playing with me. But the second my wife gets back, full on velcro baby and panic attacks when she's not near her.
How can we get her to be quiet when my wife is home just like when she's not?

- bought it at hornbach Q: any know how to acieve the bluetti promised extended 2 years of warranty for the ac200max? store gives 2 years and bluetti 2 more if i understood corectly . someone fron the store said its automatic with the sales receipt but could just b he wanted get rid of me . lol (the webpage is imo unclear or badly translated so i couldnt advance there) so i wonder if like on some makita products u need to register somewhere extra during short time after purchase.
-the guys in the store tried testin the pv input (for me) with a flexible panel they had around but i think it was set to car charging it had a car icon tht lit up and seemed do something but wattage remained zero he clicked on the icon showed imput voltage 20 and input power zero (later i noticed theres a different icon but i see the salesman confusion because it says pv/car under the icon) Q: does it autoswitch or could i theoretically charge from the car and set it to pv charge and viceversa?
-also curious about some history of the device i have some conformity page (for the eu;CE introduced 24/11/2021) some things i can assume some maybe others can fill in. seems quality inspector signed the paper and dated it by hand on 25 may 2022..if i look in the devices alarm history i see 12 events on 23/11/2022 about 52 min of warning codes (001, 004, 031 each with a 00 and 01 in front whatever tht means ; probably on/off?!) the box didnt seem to have been tampered with so my Q: (if any know) could have caused the error events? i assumed factory testing but the dates somehow dont match or does the quality guy sign first then 6 months later someone tests it?
-Q:is it possible to pair up device with cell phone without the app to do device software updates? the app seems bit weird when i press bluetooth connect i get a pop up "bluetti app collects location data to enable "bluetooth scanning of nearby bluettis device" when the app in use" if u decline it sends u back to login/connect . then theres this if u continue sounds also weird "allow bluetti to find, connect to,and determine the relative position of nearby devices?" oh and wait its not done yet "please open location service in your mobile phone settings . sounds kinda bigbrotherish to me . again unclear /bad translation?!

I'm not sure what information is needed and what is TMI. My bf (23M) and I (23F) got together back in Sept 2020. His bm (22F) and him were coparenting when we met and continued to do so up Until Dec 2021. At first she would only ask him to care for their daughter (3yo @ the time), whenever it was convenient for her. Which we didn't mind the extra time. Keep in mind she was always in Phoenix with her bf (whom she planned on moving in with etc.) and there were no scheduled times between them. Nor any agreed upon pickup dates. When he would ask, she wouldn't want to discuss it and would promptly avoid doing so until my bf told her I was pregnant. Then next thing we knew, she was planning on moving to phoenix and just told my bf that he wouldn't see his daughter for awhile. And he asked her what she meant and she just said she was joking. Then she messaged during the whole month and a half we had her talking about giving temp custody of her to her mother (my step daughters maternal grandma). Said that they would still coparent but her mom would be able to keep her from time to time when she wasnt able to come back down. If we didn't want that, she said she would sign over temp custody of their daughter to him along with any food benefits she received. We didn't go for it as we were already concerned that if we did get temp custody, she would abuse it and not help financially. She ended up coming back down and getting her for a few days and bringing her back. There were times she would keep their daughter to herself and times she would ask him to get her asap and not give us any reasons. She started talking to me in April 2021. I would give her updates on her daughter and whenever I wanted to know about what my step daughter was doing she hardly responded. I had also talked to her about how to discipline her because my bf and I didn't know how to go about it. She told us to lightly spank her which is what we started to do but I believe my step daughter had gotten used to her dad not disciplining her at all. We had no idea when she had broke up with her ex but she ended up with a new guy whose nickname was Beasle. They got together the end of May 2021. Then got a new car together beginning of June 2021. Which makes me assume they must've been together longer than that and decided to go public at the end of May. (This information is important ; trust me) The first time my bf met this guy was when his bm came to pick up their daughter ( by this time we were switching her off every 2½ weeks; we convinced her to start a schedule before our baby arrived) and I distinctly remember that my bf came back inside from taking his daughter out and he told me " I met so and so's bf. He's kind of suspicious." I said "why.?" He said "because he wouldn't give me eye contact at all." Which I thought was super weird. But I didn't comment on it much. Then the next time his bm came to pick up their daughter after our 2½ weeks, she said her bf was scared of my bf. Which i also found suspicious. I still didn't comment on it though. Then we had seen she changed all her socials back to single around Aug 2021 and wondered why but didn't question much as we are only concerned for my step daughter. Then in October 2021, we had seen a screenshot of her fb story (that she hid from me and my bf) about her ex, Beasle, and how he was in jail and his sister threatened her. She included things about how he held her against her own will, that his family didn't help her and they watched, even called him a killer, said he threatened her life, her family's lives and to take his own life to keep her. She said she's only posting a portion of what he's put her through. I admit I used a fake account to reply to her story about this and she told this fake account that he has even shot a gun near her to keep her around. That she has tried to call the cops multiple times and he always ran off and would come back and threaten her life again. She admitted he was in prison and for a huge reason. I was concerned hearing this from her and she never talked to me or my bf about this. I think because she knew my bf would be upset that she put his daughters life at risk this way. Finally, we were doing fine till I noticed inappropriate behavior and talked to her mom about it. I explained how we have everything in my home kid friendly because of my younger siblings and niece. She seemed to echo what I said back to me but I'm her own words. It's weird because if she noticed this type of behavior on her end, why not bring it up? I thought that was strange but my bf didn't want to question anything because he was afraid to stand up to his bm for this reason. That she would keep their daughter from him. Then, in December 2021, after we had our 2½ weeks with his daughter, her mom picked her up and stopped talking to us 2 days later. We didn't know what to do or who to call. When the time came for our 2½ weeks, my bf tried to call the grandmother (because that was his bm main residence) to discuss if they were going to drop her off or pick her up. The grandmother texted him back that she's under medical investigation and that he's not allowed to contact her or his bm. We were genuinely confused because these past weeks with her were fine except for the fact that we did have to discipline her a few times for being mean to other kids. She was always a little naughty when getting her back from her mom. We always just did what her mother recommended last. We always tried time out or just talking to her first. We were worried and started calling around. First we called CPS and asked if there was a case open with my step daughters mother. They said yes and my bf tried to ask about visitation for his daughter as we were afraid she was taken away and might've been hurt badly at her grandmother's house where her and her mom were staying. We found out that was not the case at all when the social worker told us that there were serious allegations on the father. We tried to ask what they were but she told us she couldn't tell us anything and that visitation was up to the mother. She redirected us to the police department and said to ask for Officer L. We had done so but he wasn't there or was out on the field. We kept calling day after day and when we finally got ahold of him, he said he did make a report through the hospital with his bm but wasn't allowed to discuss the details because it's between him and my bf bm. He then redirected us to a criminal Investigator who was looking into the case. We called and they met up at an FBI office and they interrogated my bf about child abuse and child SA. They told him that the family was scared of him and asked him why that is. They asked him for DNA and lie detector test which he agreed to but they never got either of them the day he was there. He came out an hour and a half later and was upset that he didn't find out anymore information and was upset about the 'possible charges'. Before all this also, an officer stopped by the home but pronounced his name wrong so my bf never got served paperwork. We called and asked about that but nothing. They said they'd bring it by the next day and never did. We tried calling and stopping by the police department only for them to send us to dispatch then for dispatch to send us back to ask what officer had his papers and to find out when they're working to get the papers from them. We then decided to talk to a lawyer but the said lawyer wasn't with a law firm and kind of gave us a hard time including myself when I tried to help my bf remember dates when talking to him. We are lost and tried to call around about all of this but still are in the dark. We also recently found out that his bm ex (Beasle) who was in jail had groomed 2 teenagers who were in hs in his early 20s. So we have reason to believe that maybe he had done something to my step daughter. Although we know we are in no position to point fingers, we want to know how to go about this and if there's anything we can do. We are so lost and I just want my son and his sister to know each other. The last time she seen him, he was 3months old. Now he's 18months old. Not to mention the fact that we found out his bm got with someone new back in February 2022 and had a child for this new guy sometime in December 2022 or January 2023.
Sorry it's a lot and for those of you who take the time to read, it's very much appreciated.

This post is for all women who are struggling with their self-esteem due to their partner's porn addiction. I know that this affects many in this subreddit and it can get so dangerous that it goes as far as surgery and eating disorders. I will tell you one thing for sure: it's not you! No matter how "perfect" you look, it doesn't change this addiction and on which women he looks at on the internet.
Without meaning that somehow arrogant, because I also have self-doubt without end (and I think beauty is never about one body type and sooo individual for everyone) but my body is not really different from the porn stars on the Internet. I'm a tall woman with 90-60-90 measurements, have worked out regularly all my life, am limber, get a perfect bikini model summer tan and have been looked at and approached by men all my life. In previous relationship I never had the feeling that other women are only interesting at all.
And yet... I was walking around city with my PA boyfriend in hotpans and I still caught him looking at the asses of complete strangers while I was having a conversation with him. It didn't matter what this women looked like, I noticed it with ALL body types - the main thing was tight clothing. As soon as I was out of the house, he started to watch porn sites, porn games, Instagram , even chatted with people, even though we had sex every day(!) at that time - during which he also always had an orgasm and never struggled with erectile dysfunction. It almost felt like he was waiting for me to finally leave so he could watch porn WHILE he (referring to the body) had the "porn star" in real in his bed before...It got to the point where he fell asleep while pleasuring me. All of this completely broke my heart.
What I have to say to all you beautiful women in this thread: no matter if you feel that you have too little bust size compared to porn stars, too much weight, or you think you can't perform 'well enough' in bed. NONE of that is it. You could absolutely fit that image and still the addiction is so deep in his brain that you don't stand a chance.
A good tip that helped me through was to read neurobiological studies that show how the brain of a porn addict changes. Some examples if you are interested: - Neurobiology of Sex and Pornography Addictions: A Primer (https://doi.org/10.1177/26318318221116042)
and - https://fightthenewdrug.org/cambridge-neuroscientist-valerie-voon-porn-drug-addict-brain/
There are also some youtube videos if you are not a fan of medical studies. This helped me understand that it is NOT me or you. No matter what you would look like, the porn addict's brain is so altered - what you can also see in the MRI when you compare the reaction to lightly dressed women with that of a non-addict. HE has to understand that himself and get off and only then can those external triggers subside.
At the end of the day YOU are perfect just the way you are. And he is the one with the problem. All those women will never give him fulfillment or make him happy for more than a few seconds at a clip. All those "perfect" women will never be enough for him either. When faced with all these doubts and lies, try to think of yourself. I almost lost the body I was happy with because I was vomiting daily from all the lies I found out... I had no appetite for days, not going to the gym because I was just lying in bed crying with the blinds drawn, I look paler and 10 years older from all the sleepless nights and pain. Whether you leave this relationship or keep fighting for it, don't make the same mistake I did and think about yourself too and do something for your self-esteem and mental health every day. Either way, it's the only way to heal.
You are beautiful the way you are and if you do not manage to escape this trap, do not hesitate to seek therapeutic help. If you have any questions or are looking for someone to cry to: feel free to write me. Much love <3

Hai, I'm a senior in highschool and 1st gen so I'm hella new to all this and seeking out some advice.
I got rejected from UCD but accepted into UCSC and a bunch of CSU's. I've just gotten my financial award notifs from every school I've applied too, and I'm tied between UCSC or Chico State (since their percentage of finacial aid proposed is in the same price range.)
Pros (or Reasons) for UCSC: -love the campus and I focus better being away from the city -astronomy program that I'd like to minor in (majoring in comp. eng.) -close to silicon valley and being able to network -i just really like the vibe tbh🧍🏽‍♂️
Cons: -Housing crisis -Santa Cruz tax 😬 -going in blind, alone
Pros (or Reasons) for Chico: -affordable community -able to move into off campus easily with friends (who just want to move out, but not go to college) -respectable engineering department
Cons for Chico: -no astronomy programs -smaller campus -even FARTHER away from the bay, or anyone I know
help a homie out!!!

Back at it! Round 16! Title of the poll says it all. Let's vote!
The winner of the previous poll (for Women/Round 15) was Martha Stewart! Who will win Round 16?!
Who's who...
Here are your choices for Round 16 in case you aren't familiar with all the names:
Lori Loughlin - Actress. Best known for the hit shows Full House, Summerland, 90210, and When Calls the Heart. I won't go into her personal life/legal troubles because I think most know of them. Her daughter Olivia Jade was given a chance in season 30 and did quite well (in terms of dancing). Should Lori follow in her daughter's footsteps?!
Amy Lee - Singer. Lead vocalist of the rock band Evanescence.
Joanna Gaines - TV stainterior designer. Best known for the Fixer Upper franchise on HGTV, which also stars her husband Chip.
Emily Osment - Actress and singer. Best known for playing Lilly on the hit show Hannah Montana. Also known for the TV shows Almost Family and Pretty Smart.
Brandi Glanville - Reality TV star. Best known for The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Jennifer Beals - Actress. Best known for the hit movie Flashdance, and the popular TV show The L Word.
View Poll

I (25) i'm currently in a situation where I need to make a decision and I am not sure how can I take the correct one.
I live with my parents, but they are toxic to each other, very toxic, but they are not able to break up. My mom is a SAHM.
She is in a maniac episode, I think, right now. She got all my clothes in bags and tries to get me off from her house. There have been mean things said from each part, escalated things on each part.
If i am going, she will probably have no money, as he might not want to give to her anything. The fights probably will remain the same.
The question is, should I go or should I try to stay to support her? I don't have a place to go, but to be honest, I can find one in 2-3 days.
I know one day I will need to stop supporting her. She doesn't want to get any government support, even tho I am insisting on it.
She says I am leaving to give strangers money, instead on her treatment. Because she thinks I was not happy with the ammount needed for the treatment.
Is not like I don't happily help her, but I am in a constant stage of fear, that I will be left without money to support her and me. And to be honest, I can't stand the pressure, I am deeply unhappy and miserably because of it. But, I don't want to be the reason she is having problems.

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